G-Dragon On His Changed Appearance, “My Face Is Swollen, But My Mind Is At Ease”
In the episode, G-Dragon shared that he had considered stopping releasing albums after putting out “Coup d’Etat,” saying, “I wasn’t even 30 yet at the time, but I had been a trainee since I was 6 years old, debuted at 19, and I was about to go to the military the next year. In short, I had been a trainee for 11 years, and active as a singer for 15 years, so I had really only been “Kwon Ji-yong” for 4-5 years. I had been a trainee or G-Dragon/GD for over 20 years. I didn’t even know who I was anymore. When I looked back on myself, I thought, I started to do this because I loved it so much, and I’m still doing what I love, I’m still loved, and I lack nothing. So why am I not happy? I shouldn’t have anything to be unhappy about.”
G-Dragon revealed, “Even while going on world tours and being under the spotlight, I’ve never really left the studio, whether it was for Big Bang activities or my solo work. I didn’t know where to go, and even if I went out, there was no one I knew. Everything was solved within this space (the studio). The movie I really liked back then was “The Truman Show.” I thought, is this what it feels like to be in a real-life “Truman Show” ? Many people love and adore me, but there are also things I don’t want to show. I think a lot of different thoughts overlapped back then. And of course, there was a time when it was difficult for me to find comfort from anyone. Since everything was going well, it felt like I was just being greedy by asking for comfort. I don’t think I could go back to that even if I tried. There were over 100 staff members traveling on tour with me, all working for me, so I couldn’t really complain about my struggles to anyone.”
He continued, “I was feeling unwell on the inside, but couldn’t express it, so on the outside, it seemed like there was nothing wrong, but inside, I was just festering. I just kept working until the last minute before entering the military. During the tour, the most common thing I would ask was, “Where are we?” I would wake up and three days had passed, and the staff would tell me we were in another country. I was so out of it. This pattern would continue, and a year would go by, and it was honestly hard to keep my mind in a good state.”
He carried on and shared, “I think I was quite confused after being in the same environment for such a long time. I just felt so lost. So before going to the military, I wanted to introduce myself to people, not just as GD, but as Kwon Ji-yong. The last album I released before enlistment was called “Kwon Ji-yong.” The album name is “Kwon Ji-yong,” and the songs are very personal stories. I released the album, but I kind of hoped not many people would listen to it.”
He then added, “Listening to “Kwon Ji-yong” album is like looking at old childhood photos at home – it’s always enjoyable to listen to. BIGBANG Songs like “Day By Day,” “Lies” seem easy-listening, meanwhile songs in “Kwon Ji-yong” come across more like stories rather than songs. Now that some time has passed, my mind has settled, and because I’ve been focusing on my health, my face has become a bit swollen, my expression and way of speaking have changed compared to before. It’s not as sharp-edged, but personally, I like it.”
Source: Daum
